A Cure;

2010-02-20T19:44:00.001-08:00

I love you as one over x, as x approaches infinity.

Outreach Love

2010-02-20T02:57:00.001-08:00

One last thing. I know you are busy planning for PWR and looking forward to Spring Send Off. I think that you are doing an amazing job on DC and wanted to suggest that you consider running for governor or lt. governor. I ran for governor two years ago and it definitely involves a lot of hard work that comes with frustration and joy, but I think that if you are willing to put forth the dedication this is something you should look in to, if you haven’t already thought about it.

Heidi

Awaken

2010-02-19T01:01:00.000-08:00

The past few days have been really rough for me, and I hope I will receive forgiveness. For these last few days of break, I need to work hard.

I can only describe PWR in one word: Amazing. From being a camper last year, to DC this year, there was so much that influenced me.

Tricia, thank you for everything. dla

Shelley, I know things will work out. I love you!

Never again.

2010

2010-01-01T12:05:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!

Things that have already happened to me:

-Fight with Shelley on her roof.
-Falling off Shelley's roof, face first.
-Lost 20$ in poker.
- Realizing I have a shitload of homework to do.
- Realizing my xbox live expired, so no more mw2.

Can it get any shittier?

:)

2009-12-22T23:10:00.000-08:00

12/21/09, 11/07/09, 11/01/09

<3SW

2009-10-07T00:35:00.000-07:00

Same shit all the time. No homecoming for me this year,.

All we need is hope,

2009-09-20T21:57:00.000-07:00

"Thao Tran" (9:37:08 PM): it was when i was feeling blue

"Thao Tran" (9:37:09 PM): (:

"Thao Tran" (9:37:13 PM): youre always there.

"Thao Tran" (9:37:14 PM): youre amazing.

Thao is amazing. I really love her, and that's what you get from RYLA. Amazing friends that you love for life.

Confessions

2009-08-20T23:49:00.001-07:00

After a long time, I finally had the guts to tell her. And yet, this still happens. I know I should not be mad, because I'm bringing it onto myself, but I can't help but feel sad and selfish. I feel like it is unfair, but I need to get over it. I will not let myself sink down to that level, and tomorrow will be a better day. Eh, how discouraging.

After so long,

2009-08-12T18:17:00.000-07:00

exposed.

Pictures of you

2009-05-10T00:16:00.001-07:00

So it's been a year. I wonder how you're doing.. and I hope everything's going well for you! I really miss you, but I think things may be better off like this. I can remember it like just yesterday when we were crazy about each other. Now we do not even speak to each other. Its amazing how time flies by so fast.

AP exams tomorrow.

OTH

2009-03-30T21:39:00.001-07:00

Until you let someone in, you'll always be alone.

Stupid

2009-02-10T19:20:00.001-08:00

The old me is dead and gone away.

Hah, It's whatever, . I hope those thoughts don't come back.. for now.

Can I Have This Dance?

2009-02-09T02:55:00.000-08:00

My heart is wherever you are.

Highlights of my week: BaoChau, Webcamming with CDOAN, Jeanette, missing my Bestie(We better hangout next week!).

This weekend has been such a crazy weekend. Friday was so boring, but I got to talk to Bao Chau, so it was okay! Saturday, Anna came over and we hung out. It's been so long since we just chilled and talked, and it felt so nice. Sunday, probably one of the scariest days of my life. The thought of you being hurt .. just makes me want to break down and cry. I don't know what I would do without you in my life. I hope I did the best I could in aiding you feel better and such. I should have been there last night. I should have done something. I feel so useless when i see you like that.I know you probably feel like crap right now, but time will heal things. You learned your lesson, and We are all glad that you are safe. And remember, we pinky-promised.

I'm sorry for being selfish.

It's really one of the worst feelings of the world. That feeling of your whole world flashing before your eyes. I could not even study without recalling the events that happened today. The realization occurs of, what is really important to you, who you really love, who your true friends are, what you want to do with your life. It really made me think about my life. There are so many things going on in my head that make me absolutely want to explode, and break down. There's so much false hope.

I can honestly say that I am different from last year. I can see the changes, I can feel the differences, and I like how my appreciation, outlook, and values of life have complexified.

There are so many words left unsaid..

Death

2009-01-04T04:50:00.000-08:00

AP Biology sucks. Endless hours of homework.

Mutated Cookies Lab: 1 Hour
Ch 18 Outline: 3 Hours
Ch 32 Outlines: 3 Hours
Ch 33 Notes: 8 Hours
Ch 33 Chart: 4 Hours
Ch 34 Notes: 4 Hours
Ch 34 Chart: 4 Hours

Winter Assignment, I'll always remember you. x_x. 12/29/08 - 01/04/08. 3 All Nighters, 2 Energy Drinks, 2 Cups of coffee, lots of distractions. CDN helped me in the mornings!

A trip down memory lane.

2009-01-03T13:31:00.000-08:00

So, I was walking down that street today, and I remembered you and all the good times we had together. It really made me smile.

A friendship is a sacred thing.

2009-01-02T07:30:00.000-08:00

It's so early in the morning.. the sun isn't even out. I have been doing homework from 10:30 last night, until 5, this morning. I was about to sleep, but I got to catch up with Christine Nath. She's still a pretty awesome person to talk to. She always has some insightful stuff for me to gain. I hope we talk more,!

There has been such an overwhelming amount of drama lately, and I am still trying to figure things out, but it is a new year, so I am up for starting fresh, if you guys are. Some people:

Homeboys- The guys I always hangout with, and can joke around with. They are some of the most funniest guys in the world, and I hope you guys have good luck with girls. I enjoy all the parties we have and just chilling. I am surprised we still even talk, even though you guys go to a different school. I love you guys, no homo.

JL- You are one of my closest friends, and I can reside in you to help me with the studies. It must be a pain to sit by me for two periods a day, but I enjoy it. Whenever you're mad at me, I feel so terrible. Get Karen to talk to me more! aha, I miss her too. I hope you do well in AP Biology, and you better get more sleep! The winter assignment is killing us all.

AH- Stop trying so hard! You're such a close friend of mine. and you are a really good friend. Even though we don't talk much, I know that I can always trust you because you are always there for me.

LT- Ew, I remember when I used to hate you so badly! But your perserverence has really changed me, and I feel so bad. I am glad to have you as a friend because you are one of the nicest girls ever. I am sorry we couldn't hang out for winterbreak, but I hope we do soon, so I can buy you your gift! Good Luck with your Boy.

MP- One of the people I look forward to seeing during Interact! I guess the club has really brought us closer together. I like we can just joke around and be there for each other. I hope I can always help you in math, but regardless, I know you'll do well! I hope our friendship flourishes.

JH- HOASS. Haha, thanks for making English funny. And you are a really understanding of me. It's really nice.

MH- I know we don't talk much, but we're still twins! I feel bad for not being able to run with you, and I hope your sickness goes away. It really sucks! I always see you at the mall working really hard! I hope it all pays off, and stay with Michael. You guys are great.

VD-Fatbutt#12. You never have anything bad to say! I simply adore that. And I love our funny times.

CD- We are such great friends, even though you go to a different school! I can say, you have made a big impact on my life. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I love our chats. They can go on for hours and we wouldn't even notice. I look forward to talking to you more. Thanks for all the help and all the listening. I'll always be here for you. Go tennis girl.

CDN- I will commit to talking to you more. Your insight really inspires me. I think you are one of those people I could just talk to for hours. I forgot how close we were, and I really miss it! I know you probably have a lot of drama in your life, so I'll try and be here to help you through all of it if you need. I won't forget our relationship and how cool we used to be. And I am glad we are still friends after our breakup. We did one of the impossibles.

SM- Even though we don't talk much, I'll always say we're good friends. I won't forget any of your cousin's birthdays and monopoly. aha :) And we are in Interact together! I hope we have the chance to talk more often.

KC- Don't procrastinate too much! and finish your work! I really enjoy chatting with you, because you seem so.. different. In a good way. I am glad I met you through Interact, and I hope that I can continue your legacy as an Officer next year.

WT- Age is just a number! You are one of the most caring people I know, and I am glad to have you as one of my co-presidents. You really inspire me to be nicer to people. It's unbelievable. You are like one of the nicest girls in the world. Aha, good luck with college and boys. I am going to miss you next year!

SL- We met on maplestory 3 years ago, and we became hella great friends. We hardly talk now, but I am glad when we do. You always have nice advice to give and I hope you have great holidays.

LN- We met in summerschool, during Mr.Luc's class, and it was so unforgettable! I am so glad that I met you because you have become a really good friend to me. I feel like I can be myself around you and just talk to you so easily. Our phone calls can go on for hours and hours. You're always there for me, and I hope I can be for you. I know you're in a tight spot right now, but I'll try to help anyway I can. Get that homework done! And we must hangout with the mall. Always bailing on me

AN- We used to talk a lot. And now we've stopped. I checked our aim logs, and you're still in second place with 13,053kb. No one even comes close to passing you. Thats how much we talked. and I really miss it. I see you around and I'm too scared to say anything. I miss playing Literati with you and talking to you all night. I guess schoollwork has gotten the best of me. If you read this, I hope we can be friends again.

HN- We stopped talking as well. I guess I let my cockiness get the best of me. I realized my mistake, and I wish I could just make it right. I really miss you as a best friend. For a very long time, you were the one person I could go to. I remember when we first met last year, I could talk to you for hours. and now, we don't even talk at all. It's really depressing, but I guess it is what I deserve. I hope you are doing well, and don't let the stress get to you. You do so much, and I am proud of you. I still love you. :)

AT- Aha, I bet you've been hella waiting for this part. You have helped me so much this year and have really changed my life. You were hella there for me when I really needed you, and I like to thank you for that. Even though we piss each other off, I am glad you are my best friend. Your advice has really helped, and I hope you dont go around and do bad things like that one day. Hella got me worried. I have always been here for you, through the summer, through phil, through everything. I remember staying up til 3 talking to you, AND, our two hours on the phone. Those were some pretty nice times. I hope you remember me, even if we stop talking, because you'll always be one of my top in my heart.

LNG- I was hella shocked when you added me on myspace! I remember thinking you were super pretty, and you probably thought I was a creep. It's amazing how we clicked so well. I love the way you always talk to me and how we can tell each other our problems. I LOVE THAT YOU HAVE AN XBOX 360. Aha, it's crazy! I hope you still remember the fun times we had together, because I sure do. I know things won't be like that ever again, but I am glad to have you as a friend. You are a really good one, and I treasure you greatly. I still have that Play ticket we went to go see. That was super interesting. o_o. Your death glare still kinda gets me, but I know I can always make fun of Grandma. Good luck with D.

TN-You are truely one of the inspirations of my life. You are so smart and such a sweet person.. I hope I can succeed like that. I am greatful that I met you, because you are a big influence in my life. You leave me long myspace comments and call me everyday! I feel super bad when I can't leave long comments, but I hope you don't stop. I'll be sure to keep those resolutions! I feel bad that we couldn't hang out, but get all your homework done and we can chill @ area meeting day! Thanks for always being there for me, Bestie. I know things were a bit bad with the triangle, but I won't ever let anything like that happen again. I hope you do well with your boy, and nothing bad happens. I hope we can stay like this for a long time.

CCN- I really hope you read this, because you are the one person, that has changed my life the most this year. We have been through so much, and I hate how things are now. I really don't know what to say to you in person, and I don't want to bother you, but I want you to know I am really sorry for everything.. for ruining your life.. maybe for our relationship. I know if it wasn't for me, you would be living differently, and you would have been happier. I know you probably regret me, but I want you to know that I have never regretted having you in my life. It really hurts me now that all we are are just strangers that glace at each other. It's a new year, and I hope we can start clean. I really miss talking to you, because no one has ever talked more to me than you. There was so many things I still wanted to say when we brokeup, and I have realized my mistakes these past few days. I just want us to be friends again, but I don't think that is possible. You can hate me all you want, because I know I fucked up badly. But Christine, I hope you remember the last thing I said right before I left that day.

Happy New Years, Everyone.

Resolutions

2009-01-02T07:12:00.001-08:00

My goals for 2009 that I shall try hard to keep;

-Leave Tiffany 3 and a half long comments every month!
-Learn how to drive and park PERFECTLY.
-No more eating McDonalds.
-End bad habits.
-Catch up with people that have drifted.
-Think about all my actions very carefully before committing them.
-Get 8 hours of sleep minimum per night.
-Do not procrastinate with Biology AP Homework.
-No girls for a few months. (Aiming for 6.)
-Keep my grades up.
-Improve my SAT scores.
-Study more.
-Help more around the house.
-Show my devotion more.
-Ex-Pessimist, even when times are gray.
-Stop being a dick.
-Get a Six-Pack.
-Get a job.
-Save money.
-Do my best in Interact and run for Officer next year.
-Realize my mistakes and accept them.
-Become a better friend.
-Become a better person.

2008

2009-01-01T11:58:00.000-08:00

Colby O'Donis Ft. T-Pain - Natural High

What a year it has been. I can truly say that this year has been one of the most life-changing for me. Even with the ups and downs, I'll always remember this year.

2008 Recap:

January- I asked this girl out. FAIL. Hahaha, she knows who she is. I remember worry all day and night and planning it. Makes me feel so creepy. Even with that first rejection, she is still very special to me now. I don't know what I would do without her. Tennis Conditioning hurt so much. I believe it was worth it!

February- Valentines day. Rubik'scube. Omg, haha. Ashley, if you read this, you better have remembered that! I can't even solve the damn thing anymore. I also went to Sadies with Rachel :) That was a pretty fun night. A new experience for me! Probably one of the first dances that I was able to freak at. I'm sorry for the problems, Rachel.

March- Probably one of my most memorable months. I started talking to you, and we became accustomed to each other. Every day, we would IM, text, call each other. My friend (I wonder if she still remembers who she is.. she spent hours on a picture for me. loser =]) told me it was good to stick with one girl to show that you are devoted to her; You were the one! You always had so much to say, and I absolutely loved that. I could chat with you for hours.. And I know I'm a loser for saying this, but I remember always being the top guy on your myspace. and If I moved down, I would be hella sad! I would get so jealous. I can say my feelings were developing for you very nicely.
March 24th- One of the days I'll remember for a very long time. Ashley's birthday for one.. and the day we went to SF together. I had a great time, and some unexpected things happened. The main reason that I'll remember that day is because of the things that happened that night. You blogged, and it hurt me so much.

April- The first two weeks were really horrible. I hated those weeks. It got better as my birthday came along! I got got syruped by Thao, and had to walk to 6th period with my shirt off. I got caked and ranched and mayonaised by Ashley and Christine. -_- Hella smelled weird. Near the end of the month, we made up and started to talk again.

May- A month I'll never forget. Iron Man is one of the best movies I have watched. aha. Christine and I finally got together050908, and we had a memorable relationship. =] It was a fun month.

June-School was finally over and I thought Matsushita's class was hard. oh boy, was I wrong. I miss that class though. and Ms. Nguyen's geo class. fun times, that I'll never forget. I kinda miss Angelo. Funny guy. Conflicts were rising, but we managed to fix them. I remember walking 1.3 miles.

July-Really bad month. Breakup. Sucks. Blew out my headphones. Tears. Summerschool had started, and I had Mr.Luc. I will never forget him. He made my Algebra2 experience the most memorable ever! Good luc with your marriage! :) That was class was the best too. Jessica and Laura.. we were at the corners of the room, yet we talked the most! Jessica has got to be one of the coolest chicas I have ever met. I hope I can hangout with her again. haha, Laura.. you really made me change my view about you. I also remember getting really close to Anna and Helen. Those summer school days.. ahah, I remember being there for Anna :). and I hope she remembers those two weeks of..

August- ..AP Bio homework to look forward to! Crap, I hate procrastinating. Haha, and yet I still do it. D: . I hung out with Anna a lot! 081308. Fun days. Sophomore year was coming up and I was pretty excited. Ashley and I also started talking a lot! ahha, fun times, girl. I remember beating you so bad at Literati :p We should play again, sometime.

September- School had started, and wtf AP Bio. hahaa. Hella harder than what I expected. It's pretty rough. I like my classes, though. John and Amy came over one day and hung out with me, and I had fun times with Priscilla and Alan in SF, even though he didn't what he wanted. ahaha. Christine's Birthday! Lots of people got caked >:). hahaha. I also met this one girl, Tiffany Nguyen. She's so cool. aha, hella nerdy, as well. She was an inspiration to me when I met her, and she still is! I also applied for Interact Board Member. I was shocked that I got in. Yayz. I also got really close to this other girl, Julie Lam. :) Bff. I am surprised you actually want to sit by me for two periods everyday!

October - 100908 NUDIE JEANS SLIM JIMS DRY JAPAN <3 azuki. ahah. Interact had really changed my life. I was actually leading activities, and it made me feel like a leader. I was proud of myself, and there is this sense of fulfilment when you are a boardmember. I would advise anyone to become one! and meeting PHHS interact was also interesting. I know most of them! x] The Interact Outing at Great America, has got to be one of the most memorable. I finally went on dropzone, and I had fun with Whitney :] <3. Ahaha. Trick-o-interactatreat was also interesting o_o. Leading Spooktackular with Jennifer HA, and meeting Brandie was nice :]

November- Mrs. Williams had to left for the deliveration of her baby, and Biology had gotten so much easier. Agh, I hate it with a passion still. Happy Birthday Helen! Bad things started happening ... with my friends, my bestie, home.. but I met this wonderful girl, and she helped me through a lot of it. We started talking, and I helped her get through her issues as well. I never would have thought she would have fell for me, and It was a nice feeling. 111108. Aha, time goes by so fast. I also got my xbox360<3 on black friday.

December- Rockiest month of my life. A series of bad events started happening. I was crushed, rumors started spreading again, I lost a lot of friends, my grades were going down, almost got in trouble with the law, made joyce mad, .. It was a really bad way to start the holiday season. I am so glad that winterbreak had come, so I could chill and think about things. Interact has really lifted the bad thoughts though, and I am glad that I have met so many people. FUCK, lots of biology homework to do.

Part 1.

What the fuck?

2008-12-18T00:55:00.000-08:00

There's some seriously messed up things in the world, and I think I am one of them..
There has been a really bad string of events occuring for me and its making me depressed. I guess I'm just lucky Winter Break is coming up in two days. Friends .. hah. They can really surprise you at the worst of times, huh?

Maybe This Is Love,

2008-11-24T01:14:00.000-08:00

Tiffany is making me blog. It's 1:34A.M., so I hope you read this like I read all of your blogs! >:O
But.I haven't blogged in a while, so it'll be nice to let somethings out.

My life so far has been pretty .. interesting. Some aspects of my life:

Interact: Going pretty well. I have a lot of hours, but I could use some help finding some activities to lead. It's a fun club, and I think I am going to run for Co-Pres, or Treasurer.

School: Has been really stressing lately. I'm going to sleep at like 1 or 2 in the morning, and taking a lot more naps. My body is getting pretty used to it, and I'm catching up on sleep during the weekends. I'm happy with my AP Biology grade. I think I am doing pretty well and I need to develop a new way of studying so I don't have to cram 6 hours of studying before exams. Must start prepping for SATs. All my other classes are easier and I'm getting A's in all of them. Now, I need to find a way to shrink my brain without losing any intelligence because my head is too big :(

Sports: Yay for Tennis coming up. Perhaps I'll try some badminton though, depending on the coach for tennis. I feel bad for not doing well in Cross Country, but I'll make it up! My abs are sore right now from my workout! This must mean I'm getting that 6-Pack soon. I plan on running regularly again. Hurray for Thanksgiving and Christmas Break coming up!

Friends: I care about all of my friends. I stopped talking to a lot of them, and I feel really bad about that. It's just something .. that I wish I could have prevented. I'm still trying to put the effort in socializing with everyone. I'm here for all of you guys :) Esp. Closests friends, A, T, H, J, L, and my homeboys.

Love: I'm in like right now! It's such a crazy sensation to feel this way again. I look forward to talking to her everyday and I cherish every moment I have with her. It feels like I could write countless poems about how I feel about her, but they'll mean more when the time comes. I really hope nothing bad happens, despite the complications, and more happy times away us in the future. I hope you feel the same things as I do! I<3you bc ;]

It's 2:05 right now, and I'm pooped. More tomorrow. :)

Almost an all nighter!

2008-10-13T03:53:00.000-07:00

mm, I just looked in the mirror and I have hella dark bags! I think this the latest I have ever up stayed up for homework. It wasn't as bad as I thought .. I only did like 9 hours of homework! 7 P.M - 4 A.M.) All I need are my Monsters :)! haha, I feel hella sick right about now. I am proud to say, that I finished my organelle project! It printed out to be 9 pages, so I hope that my group gets a good grade on it. So rawr, my days have been limited to homework, and interact, and sleep, and school.

My grades have been slipping to A-, and I don't like that .. I need a higher grade in Spanish 1 as well. Sleep.. eh, who doesnt need more of that!

Interact is a really fun place. The boardmember and officers are really all nice, and ;]<3. style="color: rgb(102, 255, 255);">I'm really sorry about today. I did not mean to explode on you and the worst of me came out. I hope I can make it up to you tomorrow. You should know by now that I absolutely, love you to death. I'm sorry if i make it seem like you are a bad person, but I want you to know that you never are. I'm kind of jealous of you. haha. Thanks for being my bestfriend and always being there for me :) I'll always be here for you. ily

I owe Ashley Nguyen a long comment. :) I shant forget!

So lately, girls haven't really been on my mind. But being with you really makes me smile. I hope I can make you smile too, and I hope that we still have something to go through. I guess we'll have to wait and see. =]

If you were a concentration gradient, I'd go down on you. <- Nerdy. 8D And, It's time to sleep!

I hope you feel better, Whitney! =]

Venting;

2008-09-18T22:30:00.000-07:00

AP Bio homework just took me 3 hours! It's so stressing -_-. I wonder how Tiffany does it. She's amazing, haha!

Somethings that have been on my mind and people's actions that have sparked my mind over the past few days:

- School is getting pretty boring.

- I'm getting better at running in cross country! ;D

- Tiffany Nguyen is my hero.

- Can't wait until next week's collaboration.

- Some people are so stupid.

- Assuming makes an ass out of you.

- Stop being an attention-whore. It's so annoying.

- Stop complaining about things and and then you go and do them. Fucking hypocrite.

- Stop looking at the worst of people when you aren't so great yourself.

- I remember when you used to be so cute to me. Now, you killed it.

- Good luck with her, dude! You need it. You guys do look pretty cute =]

- I like your hair curled. Schmexy.

- Wow, you are so perfect! You are like my hero.

- Best friends for life!

- Why are you being such a bitch?

- You guys are so cute together, I'm jealous. haha

- I hope you had a fun birthday!

- I never did anything wrong. All I did was care about you. Perhaps too much, but only good intentions were in my mind.

- Stop stressing. You'll do well soon =]]! Ask me for help if you need it.

- I really miss you.

- I miss our " cheeziness "

- I miss your hugs

- Stop being so ignorant.

- Start getting back into cross country!

- I wonder how things are going to turn out between us.

- Why the fuck are you becoming all the things you hated? It's just hella stupid

- I like your hugs. they're so warm! haha

- You're kinda cute x]

- Dude, stop trying to be things you aren't. and stop treating me like her.

- I love you

- Why are you so evil?

- You had your chance. Don't ask for a second one.

- You may be evil, but you're better than her

- Don't take things for granted. I won't always be around.

- I want a girlfriend

- I'll always be there for you, no matter what you do.

- I wont ever stop caring about you

- Hate that i love you

- It's getting pretty cold

- I'm hungry.

- My sister is a fatass

- Stop hiding your feelings. Not everything should be kept to yourself.

- You'll have to prove to me if you want it

- Buddy poking you is fun! xD

- I'm starting to see the bad sides of people.

- How could you even consider doing that?

And the list goes on.. more later! =]

I'm losing it;

2008-08-14T22:12:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged in a while! I wonder if anyone still bothers to read these. Let me know, yeah ?

Anyway, the past few weeks have been really hectic. It took me 4 days to read Fahrenheit 451 and complete the journal. It's such a stupid story! And now, I'm frantically trying to finish my AP Biology summer assignment, but it's so long, and my laziness is taking over. Summer has gone by so fast. There's only one week left before school starts, and I guess I am kind of excited. :)

It's 11:11. Make a wish :P <- I wish these worked. And I so own @ Pool. ;D This blog is for you! Since I owe you, haha =) ! I'm so surprised and I feel like it is a miracle that we got so close during the summer! I am glad you were always there for me and always knew how to make me smile when I really needed it. I am so going to win the bet! >:P I hope our friendship will last forever and ever. I really say you're one of the people that I most love. Keep Safe, dear.

WHY ARE YOU TURNING YOUR BACK ON A GOOD MAN, WHY ARE YOU RUNNING AWAY FROM LOVE!? ;]]

=) jk, this one's for you.

Miss independent,
Won't you come and spend a little time,
She got her own thing,
That's why I love her,

I think I am tired of this Nice-Guy title. From what I have observed, it will only suck you into the friend vortex with every girl you meet. Perhaps if you're lucky, some nice girl would come along. Everyone else? They're too close to you. They don't want to ruin the friendship between you guys by being in a relationship. I absolutely hate this. I think if the friendship was really that strong, then they should be able to get passed a bad relationship.

Another thing is having a girl like you after they rejected you because they realize what they needed and you are the awesomest guy ever and then they expect you to like them ? Too fucking bad. I think girls should really take the chance when they are given the opportunity. Take a risk. Don't have any regrets. Life is all about taking chances and experiencing new things. It's like you never know until you try.

It's better to regret what you have done than to regret what you could have done.

The realization of when the girl you like, likes another guy, and you don't want to cause any drama or problems for the girl, so you just let her like him, even though you know you are way better than him. It's just really depressing at times, to watch him make her happy, when you know it's you who should be in his place. It's pretty fucking gay.

And I know girls have probably experienced the same thing with guys. =) Life just sucks.

We know in our hearts, the truth. It kinda really sucks when you said it wasn't real. It almost made me cry. I know you're in a tightspot right now, you don't need all these problems and more feelings from me, but I can't help but be selfish. Good luck with him. You know he isn't right. We all know it.

All I can do now is forget about our love, and hope you get through everything alright. I really hope you do. Take a risk, a chance. You have to cross these barriers you're hiding behind. It's hard, and will be difficult, but I can promise you, the view on the other side is spectacular.

so why can't I turn off the radio?

ty, lt.

Gee, I'm pretty mean. I just had to get that off my head. I guess I know that "niceness" in me will never change, and it's pure. It's gotten me hurt greatly. and now, every time I think about it, it still really hurts. Things are so complicated right now. I hope everything gets better. Heh, Hope.

Like the lyrics of a sad song, I was feeling so wrong.
If you could only hear the words I say.
When your heart beats beside me.
Without you, I can finally, I just want to hear you say that you'll be okay.

And you. Thank you for being one of my best buddies. Always looking out for me, even though you can get sarcastic and pretty harsh. HAHA, I hope I can repay you =)
You are no bitch. Never think that again. I want to apologize to you.

And that concludes another one of my blogs, about my depressing life and how I feel. School is starting soon, and feelings will change. I hope everyone has a good year, and go class of 2011 ;] !

I'll be here to catch you when you fall.

2008-08-09T14:30:00.001-07:00

90 days.

2

2008-07-09T19:20:00.000-07:00

July 9th, 2008. Happy Two Months . . if only . .

Betrayed;

2008-07-04T07:23:00.000-07:00

Do you remember when we promised each other to stay forever in love?
But you stepped on that promise and did the ugliest thing I could think of.

and so, this is where I am after Christine and I broke up last night. I haven't eaten, could hardly sleep. I think this is the time period where I am going to enjoy sleeping again, since when you sleep you don't feel any pain. Wouldn't it be nice to go to sleep forever. . ?

She broke up with me because she could not deal with all the problems. She could not deal with her parents, even though they told me they would be okay with it if Christine was more honest about it. I told Christine from the beginning to be honest. She could not deal with all of the pain. She thought no one was happy for us when we were together. She lost friends. I think that is total bs.

Hella people were happy for us. Even my mom was. Her parents would be too, if she was more open about it. and so would her Sister. Even though she made me her #1 priority, she could still talk to other people to stay friends with them. I do that. She told me she doesn't talk to a lot of people in the summer anyway, so What the fuck ? At least talking to me would be great. Maybe, I wouldn't know how it feels to feel that pain, but I was there. I was there for her to support her in any way i could. And now . .

Christine, you get to be happy. Live your highschool life single, withoutme, happily. Flirt with other guys, go have " real fun" . You aren't tied down to me anymore. Your parents and sister won't yell at you anymore. I hope that is what you really want. I get to live my fucking life knowing all we've been through could mean next to nothing to you. I get to live my summer without you. I was determined to make it through the summer, and through all of the problems. Hella things remind me of you, and I don't know if I should get rid of them or not. And now my life is full of hate.

I really believed in you, Christine. No one, believed that you would ever change. No one believed that you would ever stop leading guys on. No one believed in you. Everyone told me to move on. I chose not to listen to them because there was something about you that made you believable. I had hella hope last night. I believed in you with all my might. I thought I knew we could get through your parents and everything would be okay. You crushed me. You crushed my hopes. You crushed my believing. They were right about you.

And you broke up with me on myspace. I thought we could talk it out in person before we actually broke up. I even made the effort to go to your house and see if I could say anything. I guess I was wrong. You didn't even want to see me, and all you do is leave me messages on myspace and aim? Don't you feel like you owe it to me to actually do it in person?

Our relationship was going great. It was strong, and it had some down sides in it, but I knew we could get through anything. Looking back on our aim logs, everything you said. Bs. You betrayed me, Christine. and as I write this, I cry and I really do miss you. I really miss all of our times together and all of the memories. I was your first love, and I know that has to mean something to you. You wouldn't let me go this easily? But then again, that's just me believing in you. I am probably wrong. You wouldn't prove everyone wrong twice. We were a lot of each others first. . .

And now you want to be friends. Good friends? That's just teasing me. I don't know if I can ever look at you the same way. But maybe you'll be different and change my mind somehow. Every little thing you do really hurts me. I gave it my all to try and stop you from breaking up with me. Nothing I could say could change that. Your happiness is worth more than mine? Fine. I was happy, even though we had sad times, we were always together going through them. I really love you.

I fought for you with all my heart, why didn't you do the same?

And now, I just don't anymore. Do whatever the fuck you want with your life. It's yours. I hope you are happier now, because it seems like I didn't make you happy. I just thought we had something beautiful. How could you let it end this way?

tell me how can i let it go

You used to be my everything
I used to be your only king
We used to be unseperable
we couldn't spent the nights away
You used to be my melody
You used to mean the world to me
You didn't even say that you were sorry

and the sad part is, I still believe in you.

My love story so far..

2008-06-09T22:15:00.000-07:00

Happy One Month!

I love Christine Nguyen <3 style="font-weight: bold;">Christine Chi Nguyen; My girl, my girlfriend, my wife, my one and only.

I have known you for about seven months now, and you never cease to amaze me. This may sound cliche, but everyday I wake up and look forward to seeing you. The days we spend together are the new best days of my life. They are filled with joy and excitement knowing that I have you by my side. I could not bare to ever lose you. Truly.

We have been through many pleasant and dark times. From the first day I started talking to you, to now, you have never been boring. I just hope I can entertain you forever. We didn't know each other well at first, but once I started talking to you, I knew you were different. I remember that night on December 31st, 2007. That is the night I started crushing on you. From there, I would sign on aim and hope to see your name online. Once you signed on, I would try and IM you right away! I love talking to you. You always have so much to say and I love that about you.

My friend told me to stick to liking one girl no matter what. It shows that your devoted to her and it impresses the girl. I am happy I chose you.

Through all of the flirting, I was able to have the guts to start making moves on you! That one day after school when you were awlking away All of the texting we did. That helped us bring a strong relationship! I hope you did not get in too much trouble for using all of your texts on me :P! I really enjoyed our texts. All my friends would be jealous! Remember our first kiss? The best one ever. Hahaha. x] Happy Birthday, Ashley!. That day was a super fun day. I met your sister and her boyfriend, and I learned a lot about you. That day was absolutely amazing. We had such good times together in San Francisco. I wish we could go back there and get our faces drawn :D And we can go to Chipotle Grill and use up all their napkins!

The day after that, we had a phone call for two hours! Without any silences. I loved that night. We started to learn more and more about each other as we talked. I was falling in love. I knew you were the girl for me :)

After that, the days after weren't as great. We got into a fight, I was depressed, and it was not a great feeling. I felt like my whole world just ended. Amy's birthday. That was supposed to be our day together! But you had other plans. It made me want you more. AHahaha. I was in need a lot of therapy after that.

Anna and Helen. I owe them the most. They helped me see things about you and stuck through with me no matter what I did. I also talked to other people about my problems. Lots of people thought it was messed up of you saying you regret our first kiss. I knew you had a good reason for it, and you were going through some hard times. Anna helped me see that I was being too nice. I learned a lot from those weeks.

I kept on waiting for you. No matter what anyone said. They were talking about how you lead me on and you are only leading me on and do not like me at all. They told me I should move on and you are not worth my time. I am happy to say that they were wrong. I believed in you because I knew there was the Christine I love deep down inside and that kept my hopes and spirit strong. This helped me keep on waiting. These were the worst weeks of my life. It was so hard to talk to you now. I felt like you did not even want to talk to me. It just was not the same anymore. There was no more texting each other endlessly! There was no more long chats with you at night. No more hugs and kisses. I was in total sorrow.

We started talking again, slowly, but surely. We went to movie night together and watched Enchanted! I got to feel up your leg and it was a really memorable night. The corny movie kind of set the mood. However, when you told my friends that we were just friends, that made me break down. It really hurt. You caked me multiple times on my birthday, and I still am getting you back on September 16th! :P Hahaahah. I'm going to cake you every day! After you and Ashley gave me the poster and presents that one day, I wanted to hold you in my arms and kiss you. I didn't have the courage to though. And I watched you walk away when I still had so much to say.

I didn't think you still liked me. I had to ask. You said you did, but I guess I did not believe it. I was feeling like shit, so I gave you that ultimatum. My predictions and everyone else's were correct. You did not kiss me. I was supposed to move on, but I was not ready to. I totally broke down and really missed you. Where did the Christine I cherished, go?!

The next day, you really surprised me. You kissed me and I felt like I made the right choice by not moving on. I knew the Christine was still there. :) And that is when things started to change!
Remember the dark alleys and creepy guys who paid you? : ( hahaha.
We would kiss everyday after sixth period. Haha. Trying to hide it from everyone, it was pretty fun. We were practically boyfriend and girlfriend. I was in heaven. It did not seem possible for us to become this close. My darkness was becoming light.

The day we went to overfelt was very memorable. We left our mark on their tree and did stuff in the temple thingy. xD That was a really fun day. It brought us closer. A few days after that, we went to the movies, and we had a fun time " watching " Iron Man. HAhaha =) We finally got together the next night and decided to make it 050908 10:27 P.M. hahaha. =) I love you!
I noticed I blogged less when I am happy! :P I'll try and start blogging more.

It was really hard announcing it at school. Haha! But people seemed shocked and amazed and happy for us. I was really happy. Everyday seemed like the best day of my life :) Especially that day we got kicked out of the park for doing " un friendly park appropriate " things! HAHA.

The weeks passed by fast with you. I love the way you fed me, and was really clingy. I never had a girlfriend like this before, and I am absolutely in love. I love having all my firsts with you, and I love you are up to trying new things with me! Our relationship is so strong. I love our marriage and rings! I shall keep it forever and wear it everyday Haha. Let's go on our honeymoon, ya? ;)

This past week has been hell for us. It was really long due to finals, and worse, we had so much shit to deal with. People talking shit and spreading rumors and judging us, people coming up to me, were like the main problems. Then those seemed like nothing after we got caught by your mom! She shouldn't have been walking on campus! What a crazy lady x] I was hella sad that night. I couldn't think or sleep. I was so worried about you and I did not want you to do anything stupid. Hopefully, everything will be okay.

Nothing will break us apart. Forever and Always<3. Our relationship and bond is greater than anything that we will face. I just know it. I will love you forever and ever. We shall not break up unless we absolutely have to, and I doubt it will happen. I promise to fight, wait and do anything for you to make sure that does not happen. Even if you might move, we will still be in love. It will be just a few years.. I do have some worries in my mind, but you always assuage them. Once we graduate high school, we can find a place to stay AWAY from your parents. Hahah, or maybe we'll have a miracle and they will magically be okay with a boyfriend! I so want to meet them soon and talk to them! :( No matter what, we will never break up. We haven't even had an argument yet! Haha, I guess that is a good thing. We always get over stupid things, and we hardly get jealous :) And now it is our one month.

I feel bad for not getting you a gift! Hopefully we can go buy necklaces soon :) Seems like it gone by fast, but we have been in love for more than a month. Everyday, I look forward to seeing you, and talking to you. You absolutely make me happy. I love sharing experiences with you, and I know we have a bright future ahead of us. My feelings for you will never change!

I love you Christine because, you make me happy, you know how to make the best conversations, you are really clingy because you care so much about me, you know how to make me smile and laugh, you know how to take care of me like an excellent wife, we have lots of trust between each other, you are beautiful, and we share lots of intimacy between us, making our relationship very strong. The list is endless;

And this sums up my love story. It took me an hour to type, but I am happy with it. It really expresses what I have been through, and if you read all of it and got this far, then tell me and I will love you forever! Special thanks to Anna Tang, Helen Nguyen, Ashley Nguyen, John Bui, and Amy Heng. You guys have helped me more than anything these past months. I love you guys. and Christine, I hope you do not cry after you read all of this. It seems kind of long and boring. Anyways, I better go sleep for finals! Good night everyone . . I shall blog again soon! Promise.

I love you, Christine Chi Nguyen Wang.

2008-06-04T22:20:00.001-07:00

Whee! Random Blog. I wonder if anyone checks :P

I'm living a happy life. :)

2008-05-12T22:28:00.001-07:00

Today, Christine and I got kicked out of Overfelt Gardens Park for doing inappropriate park-friendly things.

HAHA!<3

2008-05-10T23:27:00.000-07:00

Friday, May 9th, 2008. <3 (10:27P.M.)

I love you =)!

Always and Forever.

2008-05-07T22:25:00.000-07:00

Mood; Euphoric / Loving <3

It's pretty early in the morning, so let's see if I can blog =)

--

Happiness. The wonderful feeling everyone feels everyday. Some experience it more than others. Some don't see it at all. We all need a little happiness in our lives. It's a good distraction from all the stress and bad things that have been occurring. I have been feeling a great amount of it lately.

There's many causes for the happiness. For some, it may be studying and doing homework all night and not talking to certain individuals ( A )! For others, happiness just seems to approach them because they're simply, a joyful person. Others may have to overcome obstacles before they are truly happy. The cause of my utopia is; love.

Usually people enjoy spending time with their companions (Also applies to family). I love doing that as well. Getting a good feeling, a sense of belonging, and just having a great time. Who wouldn't be happy while spending time with buddies? However, there are sometimes only a significant other could make you happy. The obstacle in my life; her.

I can say I'm truly happy right now. Noted, that good things aren't always forever. However, bad things aren't forever, either. I have found a person that I want to spend my life with, and we have spent many great times together. There are plenty more to come, and I just can't wait. Spending time with her is the greatest cause of happiness in the world. <3

That feeling when you are in love. I'm sure everyone has felt it. Whether it be for a significant other, or a family member, or a friend, it is a strong bond between two people. I can't say I'm an expert in love or even try to explain what it is, but I know that it is a wonderful feeling. I have this feeling of tinglyness every time I am around her. I believe it's called " butterflies " ? I love it, and I just cannot help but smile when I think of her.

My life wasn't always like this, and my life probably will not stay like this. Love, is one of the hardest things to conquer. However, when there are problems, I'll be there to fix them. I love to see that smile on her face.

There should always be some bad things. It helps us recognize the good things and how they outshine the bad ones.

--

-_______- That felt like it took forever! D: It is currently 4:37a.m., and I am really really tired. I apologize for my blog being sloppy and irrelevant. haha x] I just had to blog.

Yesterday was pretty good. Didn't have to take the Oral Rome and Juliet test in English, but the Mock CAHSEE? Prettty easy =) and I spent my after school time with Christine. We had a wonderful adventure at Overfelt Gardens Park thingy!

It's a really romantic place! ahem. x]

Haha, we walked around and talked and it was so nice seeing the duckies : )

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y76/cOpY_mE/Picture002-1.jpg

Guess what that says :D! haha. I might update this blog later in the day. BUT FOR NOW, back to sleeep!

* The time thingy below says 10:25 because I started the draft last night and went to sleep, and then and I woke up just to blog =)

Love;

2008-05-04T22:38:00.000-07:00

mood: Amorous and Poetic;
I can't blog normally tonight D: ! It seems that everything I write turns out to be in like a poetic form -__-. Anyways, I hope you guys like this. : )

Dedicated to: The girl of my dreams.

--

Dear Cupid,

Why art though strike I with a force so incredible?
xoxo

"Love isn't finding a perfect person. It's seeing an imperfect person perfectly. "

I believe I finally found someone who is worth the time. I haven't felt this way in a long time, and it just puts a smile on my face. She's the one who I love. Her eyes, they are filled with such a ferocious feeling. Her smile, brightens my rainy days. Her laughter, makes my worries disappear. Her heart, I love.

She knows how to make me smile everyday. She knows how to make me laugh. She knows how to challenge me to my fullest extent. I love her.

She knows how to make me depressed. She knows how to make me cry and just absolutely break down. She knows how to fix everything and make everything all better. I love her.

She knows how to make me jealous past my limit. She knows how to make me realize things that I haven't seen before. She knows how to make me believe. I love her.

I hope you see I really love you. I hope you see I would do anything for you. I hope you see I'm not like the other guys in your life. I hope you see that I'm the one for you. I hope you see past my flaws and still keep being who you are. Hope <3

Through the good and bad times, we'll always be in love. This may be an exaggeration or seem a bit crazy. People may have their doubts in us, but I'm the type of guy who strives for proving people wrong. So lets prove them wrong.

I love you, Christine Nguyen <3

2008-04-30T22:04:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes people put up walls, not to block others out, but to see who is willing to break them down."

Those people. You guys know who I'm talking about. They don't like to talk about their feelings. They don't elaborate what's on their mind. There is always problems bothering them but they never tell you. Are you guys scared of getting hurt? Do you not trust us enough? Are we not close enough to you? Why don't you enlighten us?

You say you're scared of losing the best thing of your life. You are frightened by the idea that people leave. And truth be told, it does happen. But the people who just leave don't matter. There are people who are fighting their hearts out for you just to stay. People don't depart if you put an effort to stop them. This is why I'm trying my hardest to stop you. How come you don't notice it?
These people push away the people that really care about them. Isn't it ironic? We care about those who don't love and love the people who don't care about us.

I will always be there for you. My memories with you bring many smiles. All the laughter makes my soul feel light. And I know that the times we had together won't be easily forgotten. Simply, I won't leave if you don't allow me to. I hope you know I'm trying my hardest right now to preserve your happiness, but it is not the easiest task to do.

" Don't say I left when I haven't even begin to arrive. "

this is dedicated to: .. - I hope you get through the worst of everything and know that I'll be here in your time of need.
--

Fun day :D Star testing really does drain a lot out of you. hahah. It's stupid how we can't use calculators on a MATH test -_-. So much scratch paper used. hahah :)

Fun time with Christine at Lunch :)

I got a new phone today! Hahah. It's superr awesome. THE BOX IS SO PRETTY. But I won't be spending anymore money for a while.. =) hahah. AND I BEAT HELEN ON THE ENGLISH ESSAY BY ONE POINT!

Helen owes me a hug :D Don't be a poor loser, Helen!

2008-04-29T21:43:00.000-07:00

In the times of sorrow, we think of only what is wrong. We do not see what are the positives in life, and the opportunities that lay before us. To be enlightened, one must see past their woes and focus on the good points. There is always something good that happens during the times of sadness. We may have to lie to ourselves, just to find that happiness; but a white lie does not hurt. Optimism is one of the many things people need in their life. Not many can be it, and only few have it. If you are lucky enough to be optimistic, then spread it onto the others who really need. Spread it on to Miss Negative, and put a smile on the people who have just had a tough day. Cheer someone up when they are down. They might not say anything, but it will not go unnoticed. They will love you for it. Be happy with your life.

“Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.”

-----

Optimism. This is what I need more of in my life. This is probably the cause of a lot of my mood swings. I'm glooming on what happened today, and I realize that something else happened that made me super happy! And then i realize something she said, and it made me super angry. Which then leads to me being depressed again. Life is just so confusing. You left me with a question, and it probably won't be answered.

There are people in my life who make me really happy. A, A, H, J, you guys know who you are. C<3, we're going through some tough times, but we'll make it through anything. I promise. =)